Ever heard the phrase, “It’s you versus the problem”?
We often let ourselves be driven by silly choices, leading to the funeral of our relationship. In turn, we start making strategies on how to gaslight and blame our partner. When the thread is torn apart, we helplessly succumb to never-ending haunted flashbacks.
Resolving Differences in Your Relationships
Rather than putting your relationship’s fate at the mercy of unending differences, you can become the sailor of its resolution. Differences between you and your partner are inevitable, but that doesn’t mean they are unmanageable. Menstige values your well-being and the worth of your relationship and, in turn, arms you with Top Tips for Resolving Differences in Your Relationship!
Stay Calm and Respectful
Venting your frustrations can be demeaning to your partner and may cause guilt in your conscience as well. For a healthy and happy relationship to persist, you need to stay calm and respectful towards your partner.
Here are a few situations demonstrating how you can help yourself stay cool and respectful while resolving differences in your relationship.
1. Handling Criticism
You can’t help but give a shut-up call to anybody criticizing you, right? But wait, it’s your partner. It’s understandable if you rehearse a heated confrontation in your mind while facing criticism from your partner.
When your partner criticizes you, take a deep breath. Take a moment to process it. Don’t act defensively right away. Instead, say, “I hear what you are saying. Can you elaborate and help me understand what I can do differently?”
What will happen is that your partner will appreciate your openness to criticism and improvement. Not only this, but your manners will have a lasting impact on your partner. For instance, they will demonstrate the same approach to feedback in the future when criticism comes from you. Now, that’s what you call constructive resolution to your relationship differences.
2. Dealing with Different Opinions
Everyone wants affirmations on their opinions when it comes to their partners. We indeed want our partners to agree with everything we believe and opine about. But it pisses us off when we are given our opinions differ.
However, it isn’t a sin your partner has committed. It’s okay to sometimes feel in sync with your partner’s vibes and disagree at other times. At times, you are also tempted to raise your voice, right?
But instead of ruining the whole mood and companionship, you need to understand that just like you don’t always agree with your parents, it’s natural for your partner to disagree with you too.
So, instead of shouting and compromising your self-respect, you should say, “I see that we have divergent perspectives on this. Let’s discuss why we feel this way given our experiences and try to understand each other better.
3. Addressing Forgetfulness
Don’t use the famous quote with your partner, i.e., ‘I did many things right, and they were overlooked. One wrong move and it was never forgotten.’
Just because your partner didn’t notice your forgetful behaviour doesn’t mean you have a clear chit to accuse them when they forget something.
It’s important to understand that we all have things happening in our lives that cause forgetfulness. There is a possibility that you may be respected and appreciated if you let go of your partner’s forgetfulness. Or you might encounter a surprising compromise when it’s your turn to get an earful.
How would you feel if your buddy accused you of not attending to what he said, even though you had a logical reason for being busy at work?
So when your partner forgets to do what they promised, resist the urge to accuse them. You should calmly say “I noticed that you missed doing the dishes. Can we talk about how we can remember our chores better?”
Communicate Openly: Most Needed for Resolving Differences
Do you think open communication triggers you? Often, we misunderstand what it means to communicate openly with our partners. It doesn’t mean you should blurt out everything you’ve been feeling or holding back for a long time. Instead, it means expressing your feelings and thoughts clearly enough to avoid any escalation of differences between you and your partner.
“You never listen to me.” “You never help around the house.” “You don’t care about my feelings.” “You always make plans without asking me.”
See the pattern? The mistake we often make is using “You” statements when communicating with our partner. This approach can lead to defensiveness and conflict. To resolve differences in your relationships, try replacing “You” statements with “I” statements.
Here are a few simple examples you can try:
1. Discussing Household Chores
Instead of saying, “You never help me around the house. You are always making excuses,”
Try saying, “I’m really struggling with dealing with the mess and would love a bit of help.”
2. Addressing Emotional Support
Try not to say, “You don’t care about my feelings anymore.”
Instead, say, “I need support when I’m upset, and I need you to hear me out.”
3. Figuring out Arguments
Why say, “You are the one who always starts arguments,”
When you can say, “I feel bad when we frequently argue and try to score points. I want us to figure out a way to resolve our differences more clearly.
So, you are just a blog away from mending differences with your partner.
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